Tuesday 8 October 2013

the curious incident of the dork who didn't budge at the right time



inexplicably, bodge-it-man iain duncan smith, the bungling blue-meanister who has already recklessly blown millions on his notorious universal haircut (projected date for complete super-smooth roll-back: 2017), retains his precarious position in dave clingon's government as the most hated man in britain - despised indeed by broad cross-sections of benefit-claimants, working-classes, people with disabilities, ethnic minorities, and grass-roots conservatives alike...

...incredibly, even some high-ranking colleagues in cabinet hate the cunt...

...coz he always claims he's got some-shit in the pipeline, but then the system gets blocked, and he can't budge-it...

...so with a record of career-failure as long as his cobbled-together cock-up of a cv (contrived version), why have captain skid's mortal enemies, the bounty-hunting crew of fair-weather frigate, miliband's revenge, not yet handed this chronically constipated cabinet-minister the dreaded 'back-spot'...? (a largely ceremonial parliamentary procedure, which is traditionally performed by frantically digging-up the requisite degree of ritual dirt to despatch the accursed-one forthwith to a mossy park-bench in the bleak backwoods of bucks)

...and the answer to this ostensibly unfathomable parliamentary mystery is of course that captain plebwash is doing more damage to the conservative-government whilst stationed at the helm of his own morally and systemically misfiring departmental-destroyer than the shampooed shadow-boxers in the lack-labour opposition ever could hope to...

...nice work dave.


2 comments:

self-detonating dachsund - running with a dodgy pack said...

didn't i do well?

formula for successively snotty results in the toffee-economy said...

if the rest of the country's broke but you ain't, don't fix it...

...any more than you have done already...

...if you've got a winning team, stick to it...

...even though it's never won anythink.