Monday, 9 January 2012

curtailed words: democratic debate summarily stifled on underdogs bite upwards



due to an undemocratic and ruthless lord-high leg-iron-led dictatorship taking immoral control of the underdogs bite upwards editorial command, spark up! has stepped-up smartly to the posting-plate in order to defend that most cherished, exquisite and delicate treasure which we once knew as freedom-of-speech, and to allow our valued friend lady diana dubble-dollop the equal opportunity to reply to rab on the socially-exclusive abbot - ah, but... discussion thread.

lady diana dubble-dollop wanted to say:

hi guys, thanks for the expenses - it means i've been able to pay-off my coco-slate and have just taken delivery of a fresh tanker-load. it's top grade shit - i gave the driver a 'nice big tip' and in return he saw his way clear to giving moi an extra big squirt.

anyway...i'm not quite sure why red edit and kenny wadisa are using down the mineshaft's screen-account? but obviously we cia brethren can do any damn baamba shite-jinks we like, so why not, hey?

oh, eddy baby...methinks he doth protest too much, don't ya? he's a great sport tho' and i've always had a soft-and-soggy centre for him since the day i 'took him under my wing' whilst teaching elementary bull-shitting at rada...

and well, really...may i say that i feel most insulted by rab's tea-lady remark - i'll have him know that i gained my twilight position in a dodgy-corner of the shadow-cabinet on merit alone...it's got nothink to-do with any sort of racial discrimination, positive discrimination, or the fact i've got both eds' balls in a digitally-recorded vice (comprising a bedful of busty bountiful bouncing bajun babes) which they don't wan't their err...paler partners to know anythink about...no, not at all...i provide the shadow-ministers of the shadow-cabinet with an invaluable service...be sensible now, who else could source, for members of a future british government, such high-quality ganj...err...i mean cannabis sativa (strictly for medicinal use in the nhs, naturally...)

...and what's all this nonsense about black cabs...i have no problem getting black cabs...all cabbies luv me man...i just have to abide by certain local by-laws (quite similar to those to which i am subject in cabinet, actually)...i don't think it necessary to go into unseemly detail...but suffice to say that the provision of a re-inforced rum-truffle-flavoured-gag shows just how far this country has progressed since the harsh days of slavery.

...mmm...and what was the original topic...oh ya, good heavens, you just can't say anything thesedays, can you? you know, if i'd said that white people are all lovely and yummy and their men all have huge great knock-out willies, we wouldn't be having this discussion, now would we, darling?

oh ya, have to dash now...eddy's passing 'round for dindins and i've got a bathful of choccy-custard-sauce on-the-go for the sponge-dessert...must jump-in before a skin forms.