Thursday 30 September 2010

labour delegates adopt process of natural selection according to tit-size


meanwhile, back at the ranch...

...diane abbott is busy munching away at core socialist values from the inside...

having reached that awkward point in life where her teenage boy no longer wants to know her, diane has generously elected to spend the remainder of her middle-age bugging the fuck out of middle-england - primarily, by running for election to the labour party shadow cabinet. class-tittle-tattle has it that old labour stalwarts have been prompted to winch abbott over the last hurdle of parliamentary sexism and are about to project her into the make-believe-cabinet rôle of minister for women and equalities - which basically means she'll be washing-up the tea-cups. madam herself has been quoted as saying that she has her beady-eye on the 'voice of the cities' position - but i fear she'll have a serious social struggle finding any other person indigenous to the inner-city who sounds quite like her...

well, i sincerely hope that, if offered the women and equalities spot, abbott will politely tell red edit to stuff the job where everyone's equally dark - even though, it must be admitted, the part was written for her, by her...but, come now...giving equalities posts to minority feminists is a bit 1980s...init?

...and as for the minister for cities gambit...i just don't buy it - ms abbott's either playing coy (and playing down her delta-force-female go-grab-it streak of desire) in the hope of being invited to take-on something more senior..."oh honey, you shouldn't-have yes-thanks when-do-i-start" sort-of-a-thing...or else she really lacks confidence and ambition, due to her lack of dotty black female marxist rôle-models. in any case, the minister of cities portfolio is a cosmetic career-move - as it's essentially london-focused and, in reality, boris johnson already does all the work, as mayor...a scenario which would thus afford lady godiva a greater opportunity for beer-swilling in london hostelries...at a time when hackney residents are thoroughly fed up with their local embodiment of democracy hanging around street-corners molesting young white males...no thanks, we want her to get a proper job. it's shadow home fucking secretary or nowt, mate...oh, ok...maybe shadow foreign secretary...after all, look on the positive side...we would definitely have no further requirement for trident.

nonetheless, i must confess that i'm truly concerned about the competition repeating from the brown-blair reich - a glance at the list of mps who have put their names forward for mock-government draws my attention to the below-mentioned candidates who have the fresh blood of iraqi and afghan infants on their sociopathic hands:

douglas alexander, ed balls, hilary benn, ben bradshaw, chris bryant, andy burnham, liam byrne, vernon coaker, yvette cooper, wayne david, angela eagle, maria eagle, caroline flint, mike gapes, barry gardiner, peter hain, david hanson, tom harris, john healey, meg hillier, huw irranca-davies, alan johnson, kevan jones, tessa jowell, eric joyce, david lammy, chris leslie, ivan lewis, fiona mactaggart, alun michael, jim murphy, gareth thomas, stephen timms, stephen twigg, shaun woodward

...should all follow in the example of their bad-spirited leader, david miliband, and return to their constituencies in order to suffer an agonizing political death in the privacy of their own cctv'd trash-cans. god only knows how any of them ever had the bloody brass to show their evil fucking faces again?

...and finally, we wait in hope for a ghetto-blasting miracle...the miracle that late-developer, diane abbott, manages to grow a couple...a couple of independent brain-cells...independent physically, spiritually, emotionally and intellectually (err...so maybe that last one's stretching it a bit) from her pretend-ministerial colleagues who will always unthinkingly concur with ed...and independent from ed, who will always connive with mandelson...and independent from obama, who will always wait until some megalomaniacal u.s. general in afghanistan gets bored with blowing-out babies' brains before he, the president of america, feels that the time is right to order the king's african rifles to stop massacring the muslim mau mau, their wives, and their children...

...for otherwise spark up! simply cannot countenance backing our local vote-tart's loony-left-over logic-lite campaign.

2 comments:

oona sling (wore party) said...

hey, what about me? aren't you going to slag me off too? (for my part in labour's downfall)

the ghost of grumps obama said...

and independent from obama, who will always wait until some megalomaniacal u.s. general in afghanistan gets bored with blowing-out babies' brains before he, the president of america, feels that the time is right to order the king's african rifles to stop massacring the muslim mau mau, their wives, and their children...

i knew it would all end in tears when my son married a white - his son has now dishonoured his african family, betraying their suffering under vicious british rule by perpetuating the evil of colonialism in the homelands of our muslim brothers. barack obama junior, you are a disgrace to african people, my boy.